School, Anxiety and Death
There wasn’t much to our school week this week.
We took Monday off because we had spent the weekend between the hurricane(Real Hurricane Irene) and going to see my Grandma in the hospital. We needed to to do some laundry and other errands etc., to get caught up.
Tuesday we meet up with our co-op for our last play at the park for the summer. After that we got both girls hair cuts and went to the library.
We had school on Wednesday and sort of on Thursday. While we did manage to get 2 full school days in, really between Wednesday, Thursday and a bit to finish on Friday, they were just weird days because of everything else going on. Thursday was just a wacky day filled with Dr. appointments and a lot of stress and sadness. Snowflake got pink eye on Thursday to add to the fun this week as well!
Friday was a scheduled day off (supposed to be a long holiday weekend).
Anxiety and Death
Between kind of being the middle woman between my relatives here in the East and those in the West and some Dr. appointment stuff this week. There was much anxiety this week.
So many late nights giving updates to my family in the West as to what was going on here. My Grandma went into the hospital a little over a week ago with congestive heart failure. Ultimately my Grandma passed away at almost midnight on Wednesday night. I found out when I woke up on Thursday morning.
I was up at the crack of dawn(before 7am- which is the crack of dawn for me and anyone in my family) to get to an early Dr. appointment. This was my 5 month follow up from my hip surgery. I am still in pain, so they want me to do a cortico-steroid injection into the hip joint with long, big needles(yes that will be about as much fun as it sounds). I went to this appointment just after finding out about my Grandma. At the appointment they told me about the injection and gave me an instruction sheet to prepare for it. The sheet looked exactly like the sheet I was given to prep. for surgery. It TOTALLY freaked me out and upset me. I know it was in part that I was already upset about my Grandma, but I DO NOT want to go through another surgery or anything like that general anesthesia. I have already had something similar to this injection done when they did the MRI with contrast dye to diagnosis my torn labrum. So, I knew generally what to expect. The prep sheet totally threw me for a loop as the contrast dye just required a local anesthetic not sedation. Anyway, after many tears, some that had to do with the injection and lots that had to do with my Grandma, I called the Dr. back and found out they can do the injection with just and local anesthetic. Yay, I am so glad. Still not looking forward to the whole thing, but it should help reduce inflammation and help reduce my pain level, so I will deal with what I have got to do to get the end result. Hopefully this coupled with the (fingers crossed it will really happen…come on insurance company, I really need it!) reinstatement of physical therapy will get me back to ‘normal’…not mentally of course(ha ha), but maybe physically.
I realize that many of you reading this have never met my Grandma. So, I want to take a bit and remember her this week. She was 91 and about 5 years ago for the first time in my life I got to live in the same state as her. I grew up on the opposite coast from this side of my family. It was so strange at first to know that I could get in the car and about an hour later, I could just drive right up to my Grandparents house.
My Grandma knit. She knit so many caps for the local hospital. She kept track of how many she knit. She had knit 1,550 of these sweet caps.
|Pumpkin in a sweet cap like those my Grandma made|
She knit scarves and hats for my girls every year the last couple of years.
|Snowflake and Pumpkin modeling this year’s hats and scarves|
I remember growing up when I used to go visit her, she was always a great cook. I grew up with parents who ate super super healthy (i.e., weird to a kid). I loved visiting my Grandma because she cooked many Pennsylvania Dutch meals. Meat and potato kind of meals. The one that stands out the most to me was her Salisbury Steak with mashed potatoes. Yummy! AND she always had yummy desserts not made with whole wheat flour or carob!
This is her with my girls a couple of years ago. She loved me and my girls. Her smile seemed to come a little easier when my girls were with on our visits. She worried for all of us as she was a worrier.
In recent years, I enjoyed visiting her sitting on the floor by her chair in the living room and hearing about her life back when she had young kids. She would tell me about when my dad was young and how they only had one car. My Grandpa would be gone for the whole summer (with the car) and my Grandma would be at home with 2 young kids. Now, I don’t know about you, but I think anyone who can last a whole summer in the same house with 2 kids and not be able to go anywhere should be put up for saint hood! It was such a different life than anything I have ever known. I would ask her about what she would do if the kids got sick or how she got groceries. Everything was delivered or the Dr.’s did house calls. Doesn’t that sound kind of nice? It sound so much more simple than our run around lives. Of course, I think I would go nuts not getting to go anywhere, but you do what you gotta do. Any visit to my Grandma wouldn’t be complete without hearing about which friends had died or what ailment was bothering her this week or how she was waiting to die. While that might sound strange or rude to mention, that is part of my memories of my Grandma too because anyone who knew her knew these things as well.
I will end with the pictures we took on our last visit with her before she was in the hospital. I had always wanted a picture of 4 generations. My parents were in town, so we snapped a couple and it turns out it is good we did because that was the last opportunity we had as well as the last time my Dad got to see his mom.
|My Mom, Snowflake, My Dad, My Grandma, Me and Pumpkin|
|Great shot of Pumpkin and Great Grandma. |
She is wearing Grandma’s newest knitting creation a hat that wears kind of like a beret
|Snowflake and Great Grandma|
Snowflake had recently learned to knit and was proudly showing off her knitting
Thanks for reading and letting me share about my Grandma.
I love you Grandma and will miss you!
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