Originally, I was going to use this month’s keeping it real to show you the messy state of my house. I have had some other thoughts that I wanted to share and have a discussion with you all about. It has to do with aging in our society.
I am now 41, very close to 42. In my opinion, I am still young. I plan to live a long life and have a ton of living yet to do. The thing that is interesting is seeing my body begin to show signs of aging. It can sometimes be a bit disconcerting to see wrinkles slowly appearing. Seeing my hair slowly become more grey. Sometimes I even feel a little bit of panic. I’m still young, still feel young…I want to look young.
The thing I don’t get is why we value this looking young so much in our society. You know what, we are all going to get old or we will die before we do. So going with the fact that we are all going to get old, it is a part of the process of life. Why then should I strive to look young and hide my age? Why should I spend a fortune on wrinkle creams? Can I actually avoid getting wrinkles? I have yet to see someone in their 70’s, 80’s, or 90’s who doesn’t have wrinkles.
The fact is, if I am going to live a long life, I’m going to spend a lot of my life wrinkled and grey. It is just the natural order of things and all the wrinkle cream in the world can’t change the work of nature. Now this is not to say that I’m going to just let myself go and run around doing things to look and feel older, but when I look in the mirror and I notice a new wrinkle that is slowly forming, I try to remind myself that this is what is supposed to happen.
That is the thing I don’t get about the society in which we live. Why don’t we celebrate the wrinkles, for the wrinkles come with a life lived. Just look at the beauty in the various ages of my family with my Grandma a few years ago. So much love and wisdom sitting on that couch. Wouldn’t it look strange to see my Grandma or my parents looking as young and smooth skinned as my children?
The wrinkles, grey hair, and aging are supposed to happen. Maybe they show that you spent tons of time outside climbing and hiking, doing things you love. Maybe they show the cute way you chew on a pencil when you are thinking. Maybe they show how you love to laugh and smile. I know they show a life well lived. I know the wrinkles and the grey hair show a wealth of knowledge. Wisdom learned from living life.
I wouldn’t change being my age for anything. I love and am proud to be in my forties. I have so much knowledge and wisdom that I didn’t have twenty years ago. I am so much more at peace with myself and content with my life. Sure there are tons of things that are hard or a work in progress, but I love who I have grown to be. In my opinion that only comes with age.
I think as a society and particularly as women, we need to embrace this change. We need to embrace the idea…no the fact, that we will each grow older. We can embrace it and enjoy it or we can fight it. I’m working to embrace it and remind myself that it is the natural order of things. How about you? Are you at this age of change? If you are, are you fighting it or working to embrace it?
Hi KC, I have been having these thoughts lately too! I turn 41 this November and I can see the grey hair and wrinkles multiplying. It did freak me out a little but as you said…that’s what’s supposed to happen. I guess you could call this our mid-life crisis lol.
You are 100% right though, I’m proud to be 40 and I would not be the person I am today without those years behind me and I wouldn’t change one thing!
Thanks for this post, it’s nice to know that someone else is having the same thoughts.
Have a fantastic Wednesday!
Maria @ Krafty Cards etc.
Maria –
I’m so glad to know I am not alone with my thoughts and changing body. Isn’t it nice to know that others having the same thoughts…it feels a little comforting to me.
Take care,
KC
A wonderful friend of mine – 23 years older than I – said, ” The only time I feel old is when I look in the mirror.” So, break all the mirrors and live a full life feeling young every day! Great blog! Can’t wait to examine those grey hairs and wrinkles up close and personal! DAD! See you soon!
I love this advice, Dad! We just need to rid ourselves of mirrors…then we won’t worry about ti. See you next week!
KC
It’s tough, I’m not denying it. I never thought aging would bother me like it does. I guess you always think it’s so far away and you have so much time ahead — and then you don’t. Seeing my dead turn elderly overnight and then die last year really changed things for me. You are right. Hopefully, I’ve got at least 30 years of good health left, I better start to embrace the changes. Or at least get used to it and just start being thankful for each day we are given. Great post.
I so agree, I always thought it was so far off and I had so much time. The reality is that I do have so much time left to live, but I’m going to look a bit different doing that living. The truth is, we are always in a state of change…from the time we are born through our whole life. Maybe as adults this is when we feel the evidence of it the most (at least so far).
And just read your Dad’s comment. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought it wouldn’t have been as bad in pioneer days when there weren’t so many mirrors around. And now with the ability to photograph our every move with our phones…ugh.
Yes, my Dad had some wise advice…now if we could just get all of society to go along with us. lol!
Take care,
KC
I shall be 45 in a few weeks……yet on the inside I’m still 16, when I was doing my school exams and running about playing in Band Contests and camping every weekend with the Scouts!
I still camp a lot over the summer, but these days I find it harder and harder to get up off my bed on the floor (might have to resort to a camp bed soon! Boo!) and my own teenager rolls her eyes when I start larking about at the campfire……apparently “it’s embarassing Mum!”
Oh – and I REALLY dislike my streak of grey hair – that the same teen tells me is “cool!” 🙂
That is so funny that your teen tells you your grey streak is cool. I was thinking about not coloring my hair for a little while. While I am slightly horrified to see how many grey hairs there really are, my kids thought it would be cool. Ummm, what? Well I guess they are OK with it and so we need to embrace it as well.
Take care,
KC
I am absolutely delighted to be the age I am – certifiably middle-aged – you couldn’t pay me enough to be 22 again! But, I started turning grey when I was *twelve* years old! By the time I was thirty – I was being offered the senior discount when I went out for lunch. I’m an older Mom, and am mistaken for my little one’s Grandmother – and, my contemporaries are grandparents of kids the same age as DD. I dye my hair just to look the age I *am.*
But, I’m with you – we need to value age more as a culture. I don’t like the aches and pains of age- but all the rest is *great!* : )
I so agree! I wouldn’t go back…too much learned and lived.
Take care,
KC
Maybe because the different age between us, I can say that you have something that I don’t – the special beauty that a woman gets when she turns 40.
It’s something that you should value 🙂
Oh, that is so sweet! I do think there is something to the 40’s and women coming more fully into who they are and more comfortable in their own skin. Which I always things makes someone more pretty!
Have a great night!
KC
KC, I think you look great !! I am 56 and I try my best to keep it up.
We should be proud of ourselves of what we are and have a very positive attitude most of the time.
That helps us look younger and healthy. Good Luck !!
Thank you! I agree that we should be proud of ourselves. Keeping a positive attitude definitely helps.
KC
I love your wisdom and insights on aging. It is so refreshing to hear your thoughts. It caused me to shed a tear to hear such a refreshing attitude toward the aging process that is going to happen. I so agree but yet some days I do struggle with the aging, now that I am well into that process. I do wish we had no mirrors. When we where in Russia and Guatemala there were none around, it was so freeing. My hair could curl and look like a mop but I did not know and it did not matter. What a positive perspective. I would not go back to younger days, either. C3 Can’t wait to soon see your beautiful face that is so filled with love.
Thanks, Mom! You know you look fantastic for your age and you totally have my kids fooled. We were discussing grey hair the other day and they think you don’t have any. Hehe!
See you next week.
KC
Happy to be 44. I never wear makeup, I don’t color my hair, I wouldn’t dream of cosmetic surgery. I accept myself and feel great about who I am. It is a wonderful way to be.
I would never dream of cosmetic surgery either (well I might dream about my younger flat no stretch marks tummy, but I would never do the surgery). It sounds like you are in a great place.
KC
I love this. I think the speed my years are going is scaring me. How can my little boy be almost 4? It seems like yesterday that he was a baby. I look at my grandparents that celebrated there 63rd wedding anniversary last week and hope that is Slim Jim and I.
I know exactly what you mean. The years do go by so quickly(and yet sometimes feel like forever, right?). Can you imagine making 63 years of marriage…sounds pretty amazing!
Hope you have a great week.
KC
Don’t have any wrinkles (thank you genetics and sunscreen) but coloring the hair that started going grey when I was in my early 40’s. Hi from #SitsSharefest
I’ve been coloring my hair for years…not to cover grey, but for fun. Guess now it is for both. 😉
Take care,
KC
You have a wonderful perspective on growing old and such a positive attitude. I’m going to be 52 this year. I do color my hair, but it started going gray when I was in my early 20’s. A curse of our family. Everyone grays prematurely. I don’t wear make up but I do use a moisturizer with SPF. I have wrinkles that I am proud of. They’re around my eyes. Other than that, I do look younger than my age. I have all my life. I embrace growing old. It’s my badge of honor for living and surviving the life I’ve lived. Thanks for your post. Followed you from SITS. Have a blessed day!
So glad to hear of someone who is proud of their wrinkles…I hope to feel the same way. You know there are many cultures that value older people and honor them because they have lived and have the wisdom. Hope someday our culture could embrace this philosophy as well.
Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting.
KC
honey i am 61. waaaaayyyyy older than you. i stopped colouring my hair 2 years ago and got a cool haircut. i have hormonal acne LOL. makes me look younger. i use wrinkle cream around my eyes. i am told i look 45-50 which pleases me. yes it is an obsession but it let’s me be me.:o)
i love your redos. you are brilliant. love the benches most of all.
keep rollin. your family loves you and that is what counts. my 2 grown kids are THE best. i am coming out of a year of treatments for the big C. happy to be here. acne and all. :o)
It sounds like you are very happy with yourself and the age you are. I think that is a great place to be!
Take care,
KC
I agree a lot with your point of view, not feeling old (I am a few months your elder!), but sometimes the body betrays me….it takes longer to recover! And those grey hair….while I do not feel it is a requirement, I feel better without them but not enough to take care of them on a monthly basis! I think the best anti-age thing is a smile, and I can always imagine you with one.
Well…I totally color my hair. I only color it every other hair cut and as I’ve gotten older, I see a lot more grey in between color visits! I agree that a smile is a great anti-aging tool! Thanks for your sweet comment.
Take care,
KC
What a really good post. I think society is even more preoccupied with looking young than it used to be. I am in my 60’s and remember what my mother used to say to me on this, “you either get older or you die’. What a privilege it is to get older; many die very young.
I agree that it is a privilege to get older and that in our society we really don’t value it.
Take care,
KC